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The sun has been out for days and I find myself giddy. Over the top happy. Sure, it’s bitterly cold out there, but not like the rest of the country. I’m still wearing ballet flats with no socks and complaining about being cold. I’m pretty sure my tongue wouldn’t freeze to any metal surfaces if I were inclined to lick one.

But it’s not just the sun. Do you have those moments where it’s all perfectly ok? Even though there are problems in your world and the world at large, somewhere in your soul you sense this deep core of contentment. Perhaps not abiding, but certainly not fleeting?

It doesn’t take much to make me happy when the sun is out. Golden orb bright in the sky, I get how ancients once worshiped you! This orchid colored blouse is making me happy today. I’m actually wearing it at the moment! It’s a little piece of weekend redemption, made from fabric I purchased Sunday afternoon. It makes me giddy for reasons you might not expect.

To begin, I used a pattern. Oh yeah, I did! Those of you who sew will recognize the silhouette immediately, as I think most of you have probably already made one or two or three of these. I’m always last to the party. But, I have my issues with patterns. This is a Built by You from Simplicity pattern—which is part of Built By Wendy. I’ve been wanting to make something off these patterns for ages, but the Built By Wendy patterns all run smaller than I am. Smaller than I will ever be, most likely! (who are these nymphs sewing??) Fortunately, and just barely!, the Built By You patterns are larger. A little fact I did not know until two days ago!

I was raised by a seamstress. My mother is a master. This is not familial pride, but the truth. I could sit for hours listening to her machine, chug chug chug away into the night. I was a chatterbox (really!) and I don’t know how she pieced together anything with my constant talking. She could sew and handle all my “but mom” questions without ever missing a stitch. Somehow, she managed to concentrate in the middle of madness, turning out amazing work with such ease it looked like magic.

However, for all her skills, I was not a model student. Which, in retrospect, is appalling, how unteachable I was! That I have the poor skills that I do are no reflection of her–but I can imagine how frustrating it must have been to have me as a student. We are very different people and while she could read a pattern and make sense of it, it looked like advanced math to me. If there had been a “Math is hard!” Barbie when I was a kid, I would have had one. I was used to being stumped by numbers. Words were a different matter altogether. I liked words! Being stumped by them was a bitter blow to my pride! Patterns became my mortal enemies. And my sewing career ended as quickly as it began.

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The one lesson my mother made patently clear and that has stayed with me forever is this: if you’re going to sew for yourself, sew with the best fabric you can afford. There is little point to making garments for yourself out of cheap cloth.

Forgive me mom, but this shirt was made out of $2 a yard bargain barn fabric.

Did I mention I also have a few issues with cutting fabric? My mom used to cut out my patterns just to get me started. I’m intimidated by cutting on expensive fabric. Not that anything in JoAnn’s could be classified as good fabric, (I’m sorry, I’m also a fabric snob by nature, I’m blaming my mom for this too!) but I couldn’t bring myself to buy $10 a yard fabric for a pattern I wasn’t even sure would fit me. So, I consider this a mock-up. Which I hear is good sewing, right?

Cheap fabric in hand, pattern read over a dozen or so times, pieces pressed and trimmed, I cut. I cut and I sewed and I even listened to another chatty 11 year old over the chug, chug, chug of my machine. Boy Wonder kept me company, perched on a daybed in my craft room, full of his own “but moms”. Some days we come full circle.

But I love it. I love the line and the ease. I love the fact that it fits, barely, but it fits. I love the fact that I’m already planning a half dozen of these in better fabric. Jeans and a smock, my new uniform. I only need a few vintage old man sweaters to keep me warm. I’m loving that this simple blouse has built just enough confidence that I’m actually considering making the dress version of the pattern that includes a zipper. Of course, it could just be the sun talking. She’s gabby like that.

This is where I find myself today. And it makes me giddy, sitting here writing to all of you dear readers. Sipping on a found stash of a favorite tea, listening to Serj Tankian on KROQ streaming from my computer—happy to be where I am, even if my heart belongs to a different latitude. I’m loving that somehow, I made friends with an enemy. Somehow, I created in the middle of the madness, made sense of words that usually defeat me. And you know what? It feels a little like magic.

I hope your day is full of sunlight. What feels like magic to you?